So-Called Farmboy by Xevis
	Funny thing about Tatooine. The nights, depending on where you are on the planet, always seem warmer than the twin sun blistering days... When I woke up this morning in the rest quarters of my small ship, the Star Kiss, along with my Rodian sidekick, Shorty, I never thought I'd have a blaster pointed right between my eyes by the end of the night. Some days it's not worth crawling out of bed. "We're not paying you anything..." Callus tells me. Callus is the small-time crime lord standing in front of me with his blaster pointed at me. He doesn't have much of a reputation on Tatooine or anywhere in the galaxy for that matter. Just another thug trying to make a name for himself. "Come on, Callus. We had a deal." I keep my cool while telling him this. "You don't want me spreading word that you don't pay your smugglers, do you?" Two more of his thugs raise their blasters to my head. One closes the door. We're in a small room on the second floor of some building in the Mos Espa slums. "Sit." Callus shouts. Before I can move a muscle, a strong Weequay arm pushes me down on a chair. "You are going to die, Salana." I try not to let the fear go to my face. "What makes you so sure of that?" I ask, looking him square in the eye. "I'm going to kill you. You have no hope. Your ship has been destroyed, your Rodian friend is obviously dead by now. Now the career of the small time smugglers known as Salana and Shorty is officially over." Callus drones on more. By now I've blocked his words out of his mind. Callus likes to talk. Even his Lackies are getting tired. I can feel their barrels slowly start to droop off of my head. I feel my comlink vibrate in my pocket and I restrict the grin from spreading on my face. By now Callus is yacking about how power influences people and something about Jabba the Hutt. Like I said, the guy likes to talk. One of his goons opens a window to circulate the chatter. The hum of the Star Kiss's engines comes through. I smile at Callus. "You like to talk, you know that, Callus?" I tell him. A sudden thundering crash roars, tearing the weak wall apart and ion blasts fill the room. I force the chair over, my head between my legs, praying that Shorty doesn't get sloppy with the trigger. The dust settles and we just made Callus a really big new window. I cough as I look out the hole where the wall used to be and see my precious ship with Shorty in the cockpit waving enthusiastically back at me. I find Callus in the rubble, and it still seems like he's talking. Does he not shut up? "Our payment, Callus" I tell him standing over him. "I... I don't have it." "What?!" "You heard me. I don't have it..." "You showed it to me last night, though..." "That was before I played a game of Sabacc," he mumbled between his swollen lips. I turn and face the Star Kiss. "He don't have it!" I shout at Shorty. Shorty's antennas go sporadic. I turn back towards Callus. "Well I'm taking these then. " I raid his pockets for some credit chips and his holster for his blaster. He's not going anywhere caught under the heavy stones. "Don't call us, Callus." Shorty moves the ship close enough for me to climb on top of and through the top hatch of the hull. I climb into the pilot seat next to Shorty and can feel his big black eyes staring at me. I know what he's thinking already. I try to ignore him and take off, trying to act like nothing is the matter. Shorty is still staring at me. Just trying to keep my cool, not going to let him bother me. Not going to let him tell me. "I, told you sooo". Damn it! He said it. Shorty doesn't speak much Basic; I think that's the only phrase he really knows. But he understands it though. I understand Rodian too. Don't ever ask me to speak it though. "I know you told me. So let's just cut this little discussion before it bursts out into a huge argument. Can't we just say we did it for the adventure?" I ask him. Shorty lets a long strand of blurps and beeps of Rodian out, his hands cutting the air around him, antennas flailing. "I know we have to finish off paying the ship, don't worry. I have it covered." We go to the Mos Eisly cantina to wallow in our own failure. Eventually, Shorty falls asleep. You're going to see him do that a lot. "Can I get you something?" a voice asks me to my right. I look over to see not a bad looking fellow sitting next to me flashing the most obnoxious grin I have ever seen. "Umm, sure. " I tell him back. I give my glass to the bartender. "Another one of these please." "What's a woman like you doing in a place like this?" the stranger asks. He just lost points with me with that remark. "Well, me and my friend were just relaxing." Yeah, right. "Friend?" "Yeah, friend." I reach over to Shorty's shoulder. He's fast asleep on the bar. He's so cute when he sleeps. "I'm sorry, your name was?" "Cal" and he flashed the grin again. "And your name?" "Salana," I tell him. He reaches to his back and my blaster is drawn in a second and pressed against his head. "Wow. Settle down now, I'm just putting my rifle up here. It was sticking me in my back," Cal says. He slowly moves the sawed off blaster rifle on top of the bar. I rest my blaster on the bar in front of me. "That's quite a draw you got there, Salana." "Yeah, I'm not too shabby. A sawed off blaster, huh? Who are you, Bobba Fett?" "No, I'm not him. Same line of business though," he said as if trying to impress me. "Really? You're a bounty hunter?" "Yup, Going after a big one right now..." He's really trying to impress me. "Really? Who is it?" "Some local farm boy by the name of Luke Skywalker. Darth Vader wants him personally." "Wow, sounds like a big task. Who else has a bounty on their heads?" "I can't really say..." "Oh, come on." I give him a big smile. "You can tell me." "No, I really can't," Cal says. I bat my eyelashes a bit. "Please, Cal. You can tell me." "Well," he finally says. Being a woman is so advantageous sometimes. "It's some criminal that boosted a few of Jabba's skiffs earlier this week. The price on his head is not as much as Skywalker's though. The thief is a real dumb, ugly fellow." "Thanks!" I push him away and go back to my drink. "You tricked me!" Cal shouts back at me. "Now, Cal, don't lie, I did no such thing," I tell him while still sipping at my glass. He makes a sudden movement for his rifle and my blaster is back, pointed at him before his is even aimed at me. We sit, staring at each other. Fingers eager to pull those triggers. A blaster goes off and for a second I thought I was dead. I squeeze my eyes open to see Cal lying on the ground. Shorty lets out a blurp. I look over my shoulder to see him with a smoking barrel. "Awake, I see," I say. Shorty shrugs, antennas twist. He goes over and takes Cal's sawed off blaster rifle. He stands and does his best impression of Bobba Fett. "It looks good on you, Shorty." We go into our ship still wondering what we were going to do. Our sleep quarters our small and some can even compare it to a tin can. But it's comfortable and I can call it home. Before I turn out the light Shorty peeks over from the top bunk and gives a short questionable Rodian rant. "We're going to try bounty hunting." I say this and try to go turn out the light. Shorty turns it back on and leans over the bunk almost falling over on me, waving his arms, and raising his voice in the beeps that he's known for. "Yes, Shorty. Bounty hunting." I say this without turning my head out of my pillow. Shorty is still yacking. "Don't worry about who our bounty is. It won't be that hard... I know we haven't tried bounty hunting, but it's just a farmboy with an imperial bounty on his head. No sweat." I'm done explaining and turn out the light. Shorty turns it back on. Damn that Rodian. "I know we're not part of the guild. We'll worry about it in the morning." I turn out the light, again. Me and Shorty get a lead about some meeting for all top notch bounty hunters to meet on Vader's flagship, The Executor. Supposedly it was heading towards the system of Anoat. We enter hyperspace in a snap. "Are we coming up on it?" I ask Shorty. He gives me a thumbs up. We ease out of hyperspace to see an asteroid waving hello to us. Shorty's eyes widen, antennas dart up, and a tiny yelp chirps out of his snout. "Hold on!" I steer our tiny ship out of the course of the asteroid, only to meet up with several other smaller asteroids that don't seem too happy to see us. Shorty brings our shields up to max while I grip the controls taking damage from the smaller, faster rocks and barely colliding with the bigger ones. Shorty is ranting about how we are going to die and this is all my fault. "Just try to find that ship, Shorty. It has to be out here somewhere." What is Vader doing in this asteroid field, I ask myself. I start to wonder if this Luke character is bigger than just some farmboy. Shorty points up out of the field. On top of the field floats the biggest ship I have ever seen. My mouth falls open. Shorty, in awe, lets out a long slow stream of chirps. "Yeah, I take it that is the Executor, Shorty." I guide our ship out of the field, approaching the giant star destroyer. "Shorty, click on the communicator. Let's see if we can dock." I'm starting to really think we are in over our heads here. A soft hum comes into our cockpit. I hold the microphone. "Umm. Hi, this is bounty hunter Salana of Tatooine. I think, umm, geez. We want to dock with you guys," I say. As you can, tell Imperials make me nervous. Shorty tries to hold in his snickers. I slug him on the shoulder. No response, yet." Hello? Umm, do you copy?" "Unidentified ship. State your purpose for docking." A stern voice comes over the speaker. "We have been informed of Lord Vader's bounties and the briefing meeting being held. Are we too late?" "Excuse Me." Behind the voice we can hear giggling and laughter. "State your identification again, please." "This is bounty hunter Salana of Tatooine. We want to see Lord Vader." That sounded pathetic, I think to myself. "Let me get this straight." The voice is on the brink of laughing his head off. "You, want to 'speak' to Lord Vader himself?" "Uh, yes," I say into the Microphone. Another long silence. "Salana of Tatooine. Leave the area or you will be terminated. Thank you." Terminated? Before I can think, ion blasts come straight towards us. "Shorty! Prepare the landing claw!" I control our ship to the bottom of the Executor. Our little ship doesn't have much, but it does have some tricks. The landing claw makes a loud thump and clank. "We're connected." We just hang upside down from the bottom of the hull of the giant. Shorty makes a few defiant beeps. "There are going to be several ships that belong to bounty hunters coming out of this thing in a minute. We are going to wait patiently. When they leave they'll just lead us to the farm boy, it's that easy." Shorty's snout grows to what seems to be a Rodian smile along with a thumbs up. An hour later, all the blood in my entire body is now resting at the top of my skull and Shorty is asleep. I'm starting to wonder if maybe they have already left. I hear another clank somewhere around, like something else had the same idea as us. I try to ignore it. Ships start flying out from the Executors' loading dock. I knock Shorty awake. "Come on, wake up." I detach from the ship and steer our ship up-right. All my body gets its feeling back. Shorty lets out a questionable bleep. I look over as he's pointing at the trash floating out the ship's rear. "What is it? I don't see anything." Shorty beeps. "What do you mean a ship flew aw-" before I could finish my question, another ship zooms out into space. "Those two must be up to something. Get the coordinates from them." The ship leads us to the system of Bespin. A gorgeous bed of white fluffy clouds welcomes us along with a brilliant blue backdrop. We cruise through the clouds until an extravagant city in the clouds comes over the horizon. Before, I thought it was just a myth among smugglers and space travelers. Now I see it before me. It is wide in the shape of a disk, small antennas and towers juxtaposed off of it with a long thin stem extended to the planet's surface, I think. Shorty does not say one word, the sheer size of the city rendering even him speechless. We fly through the city, which was still just as beautiful as when approached. We got permission to land and touch down on a small platform. "No one is here to greet us. Great," I say, looking over at the next platform. "Isn't that Slave One?" I point outside our window. Shorty makes a confirming beep. "Yeah, I thought so. I wonder if Fett is here after the same bounty as us." That would really ruin our chances of getting this guy, I think to myself. Inside is almost just as astonishing. People walking around, the walls nothing more than tall windows reaching floor to ceiling letting us gaze at the busy streets of the city, cloud cars whizzing past them and security cars puttering along. Shorty taps me on the shoulder and points down the hall. Bobba Fett, THE Bobba Fett was walking towards us. Shorty and me decide to play it cool and try not to act like rookie bounty hunters. As Fett passes by us, Shorty tries to wave hello to him. Fett walks past him as if Shorty was Bantha fodder. I laugh my head off at Shorty as Fett passed us by. "That was real cool, Shorty. You, rubbing elbows with Fett. Yeah, that's real believable." We hang around the landing docks waiting to see if our farmboy would show up. I start to think that maybe if this farmboy doesn't show up we can look for that skiff thief that Jabba is looking for. It's not as a big a bounty as the lil-ol'-farmboy, but enough to pay off our ship. The sunsets on Cloud City were even more gorgeous than the days. An orange hue covered everything. A real twilight feel to it. It has such a good feel to it that Shorty falls asleep next to one landing dock. Shorty sure sleeps a lot, I thought to myself before I fall asleep too. I guess I haven't been getting enough rest. We wake up to see an X-wing now standing there. "Oh, Geez.-." I say as I wake up. I stretch the twinge in my back and kick Shorty awake. "Get up, Shorty. I think our guy is here". Shorty crawls up and stretches his thin Rodian frame. I look down the open doorway and into the hall. There, in gray fatigues, a young man, blaster out and looking for action, creeps down into the city corridors. "Come on, Shorty" I draw my pistol. "I think that's him." We follow him down, trying to inch as close to him as we can. He creeps around the corner, and we hear an exchange of blaster fire. Then everything is quiet. I feel Shorty's body shaking in fear next to me. "Are you shaking?" I look over at Shorty. He shakes his head, no, and tries to stop the clanking of his bony knees. "You are shaking. You're really scared," I tease him. "Stay here. If I shout, come and get me." I slowly go around the corner to see the farmboy go around another hallway. I go as fast as I can on the tips of my toes trying to catch him. All I can think of is the loss of credits if I don't catch this guy, what me and Shorty would do if we lost our ship, and the humiliation I'd face if this guy slips through my fingers. With all this thinking going on in my head, I don't catch him in time before he goes through a doorway and it locks. Shut. "NOOO!!" I shout at the top of my lungs as I fall to the floor. Shorty comes around the corner, crouches down and stares at me, looking into me eyes. He waves his big green hand at me, seeing if my eyes follow his long fingers. "Salana?" he asks. He does know how to say my name. I just sit there, not wanting to do anything. Just let the feeling of failure take over my body. I can be so dramatic at times. Soon after our failure, Cloud City is evacuated. Shorty flies me back to the Mos Eisly Cantina. There I zone out at the wall over the bar. Shorty bleeps and beeps his heart out trying to cheer me up. Finally he gives up and falls asleep, again, on the bar. I keep thinking of how close I was to the bounty. And how that little farmboy just slipped through my fingers. Why didn't I just tell him to freeze? Why didn't I just rush him from behind and pin him down? Damn, I feel like a loser. "Yeah, I have five skiffs right inside my ship right now," I hear a voice bragging down the bar to the bartender. "Sell them to you for 2,000 credits, all together." This couldn't be that skiff thief. Could it? My luck would be to sweet if it is. I wake Shorty up and whisper for him to follow me. We slide down to his end of the bar, unbuttoning the holster cover to my blaster. "Excuse me. I couldn't help overhearing that you have some skiffs on sale. Are they Jabba's?" I ask politely. His eyes light up and he makes a break for his blaster. My barrel is pointed between his eyes before he even has his up. "You're coming with us. There's a nice bounty on your head." I stand there, no clue of what happens next. Shorty draws his blaster and makes his way to the back of the thief, making a stern line of beeps. "What?" the thief said. "He said put your hands behind your back, no sudden movements or we'll blast you to pieces." I see the top of Shorty's head over the thief's shoulder. I think he's tying his wrists together or something. Later I find out Shorty had used his own belt to tie the wrists together. He's so resourceful sometimes. This being our first bounty we stash our captive in the lockers of our private quarters. Hey, even Fett had to start somewhere, right? We return him to Jabba and get our bounty. We are invited to stay for a few days in Jabba's palace. Supposedly there was a huge bounty just captured by Fett and that guy and ours were going to be served to the creature known as Sarlacc. We didn't stay though. Good thing too, because from what I hear that farmboy we were after was not a farmboy after all. He's the last of some old religion. A Jedi, or something. Now I don't feel so down anymore. A farmboy is one thing. But I guess a Jedi is a whole different thing. Anyway, he and a bunch of big players in the rebel alliance destroyed Jabba and all the passengers aboard the barge. Are we lucky or what?